Jeb Bush placed on suicide watch ahead of N.H. primary

CONCORD, NH – Presidential hopeful Jeb Bush was seen being checked into a local psychiatric hospital earlier today ahead of the first primary of the 2016 United States election season. This unexpected turn of events was triggered by Bush’s paranoia of his guaranteed defeat at the primaries tonight, which would probably be the swan song to his campaign, that officially played in an embarrassing rally.

Even though the swan song played long before the “please clap” incident, just don’t tell him that, you’ll trigger his already crippling depression.

Bush was said to have been placed on suicide watch as his campaign is derailed by other Republican candidates. Nurses have told NNN that he was last seen in a hospital room chanting “Jeb Bush 2020! 2024! 2028? 2032…” while crying into a Guaca-Bowle.

His campaign spokesperson declined to comment about the situation.

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