EVEREST, NT – A small town is reeling from a tragic drunk driving accident that left a high school senior, Thomas Wadsworth, dead. With many people mourning the loss of a ‘bright student’ and ‘star athlete’. His family and girlfriend mourn the loss of what they said was a caring, happy, and generous person, and that is the only thing the local news showed.

However, many people are doing quite the opposite. Expressing conflicted feelings about the teen’s death due to the fact he was a dick when he was alive.

“I feel for his family and all,” a classmate told NNN today, “But that piece of shit stole 20 dollars from me to buy booze.”

“I don’t care how he died that guy hacked my PSN and stole my DLC.” another classmate told us. “He can burn in hell for that man.”

Many people are now scared to speak out on the dirt they have on Wadsworth, questioning their moral standing on it, considering he died in a horrific car accident. Which was caused by an intoxicated man that jumped the median on Neomongolian Federal Highway 223 around 8pm Wednesday. The driver was going close to 120 kilometers per hour when he collided head-on with Wadsworth’s vehicle. Who was transported via LifeFlight to Changshan General Hospital, where he died 4 hours later.

HAWTHORNE, CH – Disgruntled fast wood workers were upset over their wages today after receiving their monthly paychecks. This comes after the same employees of a local burger joint believed a prank call which made them destroy half the windows of the building.

“It’s an outrage that we don’t get a decent living wage of 15, 16 dollars an hour,” Lindsay Simmons, assistant fry cook said, “I have to deal with rent and putting food on the table.”

However, she has proven that her worthiness in the work field is lower than the delegate counts of Bernie Sanders after smashing several windows on May 29th. At around 11 in the evening that night, a person phoned in claiming to be “Corporate” saying that “Our safety systems have detected a high amount of methane in the kitchen” and that the employees should “use tools to break the windows.”

Ms. Simmons, who took the call, reportedly picked up a chair and hit a window, ordering others to do the same. The owner of the restaurant has declined to comment, but damages are estimated to be around 12,000 dollars.

The business is locally owned, with 3 locations and no corporate offices. Police are looking for the prank caller, but have not had any leads.