CHANGSHAN, CH – As the WWE pay-per-view event draws near, speculations are running wild that Chinkus, President of Neomongolia, will fight every single member of the Brony fandom at ‘Wrestlemania 32’ in Dallas, TX. However, will this actually happen?

No.

No it won’t.

Even me, a journalist typing this article in my office on the 75th floor of the NNN HQ building knows that Chinkus won’t do this.

One, he isn’t signed to WWE, so he cannot appear as a talent for their company. Two, he isn’t a wrestler at all, so he is unable to properly work a match without breaking his neck or the neck of his opponent(s). Three, there are about 10 million Bronies give or take so fighting them all within in a 4 hour window is physically impossible. Even for Chinkus, even with his brother Dr Phuc, even with his entire family. It is impossible. I doubt you can even fit 10 million people in the staging area and ring of the AT&T Stadium.

It won’t happen, sorry to disappoint.